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Well if you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say.
I never want to let you down or have you go, it's better off this way.
For all the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took,
Remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor?
I'M NOT OKAY
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out
What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems?
(I'm not okay)
I told you time and time again you sing the words but don't know what it means
(I'm not okay)
To be a joke and look, another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time take a good hard look!
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out
Forget about the dirty looks
The photographs your boyfriend took
You said you read me like a book, but the pages all are torn and frayed
I'm okay
I'm okay!
I'm okay, now
(I'm okay, now)
But you really need to listen to me
Because I'm telling you the truth
I mean this, I'm okay!
(Trust Me)
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
(Okay)
Friday, June 03, 2005
I just realized that today is the last day of fun... CRAP!!! Oh well...
Anyway, time to say what happened on Tuesday. 2 things happened. The first one is not there anymore. The second one is still there. What am I talking about? I'm so weird...
1) I agreed to do something that I was planning to do, ONLY PLANNING.But I shalln't say what it is... Cause... But the person forgot about it. Thanks, to that person. Haha...
2) Someone from my past, recent past, came back. So? Her sudden come back is a big blow to me. I'm not ready to accept her after what happened last year. I need time to reflect and think. Last year was a roller coaster ride for me. So many things happened. Emotions ran high. It went by so fast. And was gone before I could catch it. It was the year I decided that I didn't want to be nice anymore. And there was so much emotion abt ____. Those of you who don't know the story, let me start from the beggining. I'll only say is necessary. Things you don't need to know well not be here.
She was the spolit and I'm-always-right type of rich kid. She types to as tuu, me as miie, etc. At the beggining of last year, we started out as stangers. Then, it turned into an acquaintanceship. After a while, it was a friendship. Then a sister-ship. We were quite close. I treated her like a best friend. I went recess with her. Hung out with her. Told her my secrets. Then when the school held the MGS Plus, at the end of the year, Charis, Mabel, Si Hui and I were in charge. Actually, it was Charis and I, but Mabel and Si Hui took initiative and helped without us asking, there was lots to do. Anyway, she felt out cause Mabel, Charis and I were her "sisters" and she was the only one not doing anything. So she took charge. She sat on the teacher's table and gave orders. And she allowed people to reserve stuff that was to be sold!!! Mabel and Charis were dam pissed. And they decided tell her off. I was in the middle, but I didn't side anyone. She, however, thought, that just cause I didn't say anything in her defence, was siding Mabel and Charis. So she gave us the cold shoulder. She called me names, said bad things to me and insulted me. And the best part was I DID'NT DO ANYTHING!!!
How do you think I can accept her now? I know that I must learn to accept what has happened in the past, no matter how bad it is. But I can't. I trusted her and this was the way I was repayed. It is like saying someone close to you went to jail and is now out. And that person wants to be in contact with you, be your friend and act like nothing happened. How would you feel? I forgot her when we weren't in the same school anymore. So when she came back. Everything that happened flashed before me. Btw, if YOU are reading this, this is what I truly feel and have 1 thing to say to you... I HATE YOU, GET THE HELL OUT OF MY LIFE!!!
_broken_
10:31 am
T a g b o a r d
A b o u t M e
Cassie
13
17 Feburary
MG
Singapore